"Experience life in all possible ways -- good-bad, bitter-sweet, dark-light, summer-winter. Experience all the dualities. Don't be afraid of experience, because the more experience you have, the more mature you become." OSHO
Dualities...
OSHO offers insight (as usual) into life experiences as represented by dualities or polarities as it were or should be. He offers that by doing this, by experiencing life in ALL POSSIBLE ways, we gain maturity.
Was it in fact meant for us to experience all these things ALL AT ONCE? The bitter and the sweet, the good and the bad, the dark and the light...
ALL AT ONCE?
Well, that is where I find myself. In the dark and the light, hot and cold, bitter and sweet. I feel as if I am experiencing these things all at once and it is NOT a good feeling.
It was with great anticipation that I welcomed the new year.
With a slow, but steady success rate in the weight loss battle,
approached 2011 as the year that I would MASTER many things.
Master my weight loss approach, Master my writing strategies, Master my therapeutic interventions, Master my relationships, Master my money management skills...and the list goes on.
Instead the new year began with huge losses.
On January 3rd I was terminated as a result of a Reduction In Force, a RIF as they call it.
Four days later I received a call informing me that my grandmother had died...
And then my car started making crazy sounds!
"I mean, really!?," I thought out loud.
"Seriously?"
I looked up in the direction of God and asked:
"Am I being punked?!"
It felt like NONE of this was really happening.
Actually, it felt more like it SHOULD NOT be happening.
Sadly, it was all very real.
All the pain, the confusion, the anger...the feelings of loss.
Still...I was able to experience a strange sense of peace...maybe a bit of balance & relief.
For a brief moment in time I was RELIEVED, RELEASED in a way...
...SHORT LIVED...
Of course there was also a sense of worry about what I would do next.
Who would hire me?
Would I be able to pay my rent?
My car note?
GEICO?!?
"...Don't be afraid of experience...the more experience you have the more mature you become..."
This new year has brought me yet another level of maturity (according to OSHO).
Maturity...as I drove up the New Jersey Turnpike to prepare for funeral arrangements...
Maturity...as I pumped myself up to walk into my grandmother's house knowing she would not be there....that she would never be there again...
Maturity...as I wondered how I was going to keep it together....how ANY of us were going to keep it together...
Maturity...as I walked off the elevator and faced the door: 5A, the door read....
Maturity...My life is forever changed...
Maturity...as I "weight" for the pain to pass and the peace to plant itself deep inside my chest.....
...our experiences: bitter/sweet, good/bad, dark/light...
...maturity...
...dualities...
...maturity...
~Weigh in with words
